A baby tried to kill me!

So for the 2nd time in my life, a baby tried to kill me!

Let me preface this whooooole post by saying, I'm terrible about going to the doctor. Barring being in immobilizing pain, I'm one to shrug things off as "it'll go away". It's a terrible habit that I'm in the process of breaking...in the meantime, let's talk!

So we weren't TRYING-TRYING to have another baby, but we also weren't taking any precautions. As far as I was concerned, when my cycle showed up in January, we were in the clear! But 4 days after my cycle stopped- it came back. I wasn't in any pain, so it was just back...and annoying. The female body can be weird! Especially when you're postpartum and still breastfeeding. Hormones make the body do strange things. I've had an ectopic pregnancy before, and since I wasn't in any pain, I chalked it up to hormones and just figured it'd go away.

It didn't.

By the end of January I decided I needed to see someone. But not like my real Dr, just A Dr.

So here in Kuwait there are levels to medical care. Let's say you have a rash, you may not want to drive 35min to Salmiya or Jabriya to go sit and wait at one of the larger hospitals. It's easier to pop over to your local clinic where there's zero wait, you get some meds, and you're out the door in 10! Quick. Easy. Not nearly as thorough, but it usually gets the job done.

This is the route I went. Cause again, I feel fine! I'm thinking this is a hormonal thing, I'll get some meds, life goes on. This was a bad move. She did an ultrasound and showed us a "large follicle". She said everything appeared ok, the problem was hormones. See I knew I needed blood work done, but in true "Easy Dr." form, she said nooooooo, you're fine just take these meds.

Bad idea.

I took the pills for 2 days, started having abdominal pain, and stopped.

Now this is the part where common sense is supposed to kick in, I'm supposed to go see a REAL DOCTOR and get some REAL ANSWERS.... but no. Not Sharee. Noooooo, Sharee sat on her couch for TWO MORE WEEKS bleeding out because I was exhausted and just wanted to rest. I thought it would pass. Seriously. That is until sharp pains woke me up out my sleep!

** A note for my readers: Let me add that both my husband and my good friend Nikki spent the greater part of this time insisting that I take my tail to the Dr. I'm seriously hard headed, and owe them both an apology cause I promise I'm gonna listen to y'all more 😩.**

No longer able to put this off my husband made me get dressed, and we headed to Al Seef to attempt to get answers. The Dr. said they'd do and ultrasound and a pregnancy test. I'm like - FOR WHAT?!? I'm not pregnant??? She's like, it's protocol. So we do the ultrasound. Turns out, that thing the other Dr called a "follicle" was actually a follicular cyst that was now almost 7cm in size. But that wasn't even the biggest surprise. The blood test came back POSITIVE. We were pregnant!

You know, the universe has been dishing out these lessons to me about being judgmental (lol). I was all "How did this happen?!?" With the answer being very obvious...I knew exactly HOW it happened. Unfortunately, I also knew there was no baby on the ultrasound. I'd been bleeding for a little more than a month now. These weren't characteristics of a normal pregnancy.

Al Seef needed more blood work, so I got up and did that the next morning. The quantitative results came back and the numbers were low. Al Seef's Dr wanted me to repeat the test in 48 hrs, but at this point I'd accepted my reality. This wasn't a viable pregnancy. All this time I'd been miscarrying and didn't know it. It was time to see my REAL Dr.

I messaged Dr. Fatima's secretary at Royal Hayat and they got me in for a noon appointment that same day. She confirmed the cyst, the need for laparoscopy, as well as the need for a D&C. We suspected that the pregnancy was somewhere outside the uterus, but the cyst made it impossible to see where. Surgery was scheduled for 2 days later, and that was that!

True to form, I was about 10min late checking in. Once I settled in, like always, I requested for the anesthesiologist to come and place my IV. I'm a crazy lady about being stuck more than once! With my IV in, they eventually wheeled me into the OR and I was out!

Let me take a quick minute to give huuuuuuge props to my anesthesiologist!!! She was amazing, and this was the first time I've EVER come out of anesthesia without having a panic attack. It's usually a pretty traumatic experience- but this time it was not!

Unfortunately, what was waiting for me on the other side of coherency was this:

I'd had another ectopic pregnancy. They called my husband while I was on the table and asked him to make a decision about my body - do we remove her partially damaged right Fallopian tube and make her sterile OR do we try to repair it. Of course, my love said repair it because he wasn't comfortable making such a final decision FOR me with zero input FROM me. Unfortunately, the part that they kinda left out when asking him to make this choice, is that if another unplanned pregnancy is ectopic it could be detrimental to my life.

It's been a month since my surgery. I decided to be a grown up and get some birth control in the form of an IUD again. I had such a positive experience with Mirena after the birth of my oldest son, it felt like the right move! If we do have more little humans one day, it will be because we made that choice.

In the meantime, I'm just here! Happy to be alive to continue to be a mommy to the little ones we have already!